What makes a perfect relationship

Posted by Tim Levin, 09 Nov

Whenever we watch movies of princesses, princes, and knights, they usually have the perfect relationship with happy endings and happily ever after. I have been watching such movies growing up. It is for this reason that most girls usually dream of that perfect wedding in the hopes that it will also make them have great relationships with their happily ever after. Much as we all strive to have great relationships, one thing that people have no idea about is how to have that great relationship.

Is there a way that people can achieve this? Read on as we look at this overly searched topic.

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Tips for succeeding in a partnership

It can be very tricky to have a great relationship with your partner. See, the thing is, we usually come from different backgrounds. So when one meets their partner, usually it's later in life. People are usually brought up differently. So when a couple meets in adulthood, they usually share different views, values, and opinions that are usually shaped by how or where they are brought up. That is why, for instance, republican democrat dating can be a bit tricky.

One thing that can make things smoother is for a couple to find some common ground even when they have differences. They need to find ways of compromising and meeting in the middle.  Well, here are some of the tips for a perfect relationship.

Communication

One of the ways of succeeding in a partnership is to talk to one another. Communication is key and has been cited over and over again as the best way for a couple to have a great relationship. One thing that people need to realize is that no one is a mind reader. So you need to air out issues that might be affecting your relationship. A lot of people normally have no idea how their actions affect the other person. So if your partner does something that upsets you, you need to find a way to talk about out.

With communication, you don't just point out the negative things. Also, let your partner know about the positive things he might be doing. Positive reinforcement usually works better. At the same time, even if you are angry, try and gently point something out instead of criticizing your partner. When they are great, appreciate them too.

In a fight, try seeing things from their point of view or from a neutral point

Being rational in a fight can really be hard because anger usually clouds our judgments. That said, it doesn't mean that best partner relationships are impossible to achieve. Sometimes, stepping out and looking at the issue from someone else's point of view can really help. This is the reason why people are usually advised to wait and deal with an issue after the anger has subsided.

One thing you need to both acknowledge is that you are a couple. So the "me vs. you" attitude should be checked when in a fight. You are not in a fight with an enemy. Teach yourselves to fight as a team. So instead of pointing fingers, try and find solutions instead.

Most people have a “me vs. you” attitude when it comes to fighting. They view it as a battle against the enemy. This could not be more destructive! Instead, have a “we” or team mentality. You’re both in this relationship together, so you have to come up with solutions together. Stepping back and looking at it from an objective perspective helps tremendously.

Give your relationship the attention it deserves

One of the tips on how to have a perfect relationship is to give that relationship attention. A relationship can't be expected to work on 'auto-pilot'. Just like plants, the relationship needs to be taken care of and watered. So if you don't water or feed your relationship, it is bound to die. So put in some effort to nurture it by making time for you and your partner.

Support each other's needs, hopes, and dreams

Whenever necessary, try and put the needs of your partner before your own. If it is something that affects your values, you are allowed to be a little selfish. Remember to care about your partner's needs too.

The other thing is that you need to also support each other's dreams. If you squash your partner's needs, chances are, with time they will grow resentful. Also, don't always be the one who supports and just ignores your own needs. Both if you need to be able to support as well as make sacrifices - both ways. Always encourage them to follow their dreams and be each other's rock.

Laugh together and build a friendship. Sometimes, it's never that serious.

Best partner relationships are but on friendships. One of the things that make romantic relationships built on friendships work is because people are usually more caring and more forgiving of their friends. The other thing is that friends usually know how to have a good laugh together and have fun. Whoever said 'laughter is the best medicine' was not wrong.

The thing is when things get too serious, they can become a little stressing and then they forget to laugh. When we forget to laugh, we start focusing on the negative things about our partners. Well, if you want to build the perfect relationship, always remember to laugh and have fun with each other.  Couples that have fun and laugh together, stay together. Find some amusement in your relationship.

Talk about your relationship goals

As I mentioned earlier, a relationship shouldn't be left to run on autopilot. You need to discuss with one another from the onset of the relationship what goals you have about your relationship. There are lots of important things that are usually ignored when people begin a relationship that usually become obstacles in the future. For instance, lots of people never discuss the topic of kids, only to realize much later in a relationship that their partner never had kids on their mind from the get-go.

It's important to just put things out there and talk about your relationship goals for say, the next six months so that you don't end up wasting each other's time. 'Where will you live?' Some of these things might look like they are supposed to sort themselves out automatically, but to be honest, if not given the amount of discussion airtime they deserve, they sometimes wreck things later. If the two of you are on the same wavelength, discuss how to achieve those goals.

Don't expect perfection

Last but not least one of the other tips for a perfect relationship is NEVER to expect perfection. See, perfection is relative. So what you might be calling perfect might not be the kind of perfection that your partner might be striving for.

Am I contradicting myself given the topic of this article? Probably. The thing is, we need to be realistic here. So if your idea of perfection is 100%, that my friend is the most unrealistic thing on earth. We usually find ourselves in fights with our own siblings and parents. And, these are people that we were probably brought up similarly. But somehow, we still have our differences. We are all wired differently.

Well, here is one piece of advice I am going to leave you with. If you go in expecting perfection then you will be better off going into the relationship expecting to fail. Look at perfection from the point of 'the relationship works' as opposed to your 100%.

There is no 100% perfect relationship. The relationships that work are not 100% perfect. Work has gone into these relationships. That is the reason why we think of them as perfect. This is mainly because they work. Like people always say, if you think the grass in your neighbor's lawn is greener, it's probably because it's been watered and given a lot of attention. So if you really want things between your partner to work out pay attention to your relationship. Work as a team!

For more articles on how to have a perfect relationship, visit Love is All Colors.

5 responses to "What makes a perfect relationship"

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  1.   Harvest75 says:
    Posted: 31 Aug

    I agree with 100%. Great insight and good read!

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  2.   Snm60 says:
    Posted: 27 Aug

    You have hit the bull by the eye. You have really nailed it.

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  3.   Sophy68 says:
    Posted: 27 Aug

    Communication is the key

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  4.   Meetrajsinh says:
    Posted: 27 Aug

    Yes

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  5.   Ragel says:
    Posted: 07 Dec 20

    This is an interesting piece indeed, it made me review my relationships. Thanks

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